HUMOR- FBI'S TEN MOST "UNWANTED"

FBI'S TEN MOST "UNWANTED"

With the coming of the holiday season, the FBI (Food and Body
Improvement group) has issued their "TEN MOST UNWANTED" list.
The list comprises the ten most UNWANTED habits the WLS patient
wishes to see return to his/her lifestyle. Here is the list, beginning with number ten:

10. Casper Carbonation--Slyly tricks unsuspecting RNY patients into
believing that it is okay to drink "diet sodas". The carbonation
causes their pouches to be "stretched" without their realizing it is
happening.

9. Sam (aka "The Shoveler") Schwartz--Shovels food from the plate to
his mouth without stopping. Never puts the utensil down between
bites.

8. Clara the Closet Eater--Hides her eating from those around her.
No one can understand her lack of weight-loss; "She NEVER eats!"

7. Louise Lethargic--Never has the (perceived) energy to exercise as
she is supposed to.

6. Gertrude Grazer--Never "stops" to eat, but eats continually all
day, never realizing what she has eaten.

5. Carrie Carbohydrate--Skips the meat, fruit and vegetables. Heads
straight to the breads and sweets.

4. Lasagna Liz--Places layers of food on her plate in order
to "maximize space"....is able to blend all of her favorite
foods "without eating one whole helping"!

3. Bob (aka Big Bob) Portions--Consistently eats larger portions than
recommended until caloric intake exceeds what the body needs to
function.

2. Carmella (aka Sticky Fingers) Carmel--Eats anything containing any
type of carmel.

1. Charlie the Chocolaholic--Craves nothing but chocolate all day
long.

Please do all you can to resist the temptation to allow these
nefarious individuals back into your life. Their motto remains "If
there is room for one, there's room for all!"

--BNS